Bolt to compete in LUCA outdoors final

Usain Bolt will compete in the LUCA Outdoor Series Final at Battersea in May.

The nine-time Olympic Champion and world record holder will compete for the alumni club, Motspur AC.

Speaking to LUCA on the 1st of April, Bolt said; “I have won Olympic medals and world championship medals, but the one that means the most to me is missing. I want a LUCA medal”.

Bolt admitted that this will be his toughest test yet. “I know that Clyde Anucha, Mahmoud Barrie and Hamish Mundell wont roll over easily. They’re having incredible seasons.”

But he’s up for the challenge. “It’s what I’ve been working on for my whole career. It all comes down to this. To hear the crowd at Battersea and know that I’m helping my team pick up LUCA points…. It’s just an incredible feeling.”

When reminded that Motspur don’t actually score (only student athletes do), Bolt said “I may just join St Mary’s like Mo did. They named a track after him. Maybe they’ll rename it the ‘Bolt Arena’ if I help them win LUCA. Then again, they’re just a bunch of fast joggers. Maybe UEL or Brunel instead.”

The Jamaican joined several other high profile athletes in confirming their attendance at the LUCA final today. Team GB Mo Farah said “I’m coming and I’m going to give shot put a go.”

Jess Ennis-Hill said “Steeplechase looks like a lot of fun, but doesn’t the water get cold?”

Olympic Long Jump Champion, Gregg Rutherford said he will register for the high jump. Clarifying his choice he said, “I mean, it’s just jumping upwards instead of forwards, right? I’m great at jumping forwards, so I don’t see that jumping upwards will be very difficult”.

Once reminded that gravity is a law of nature, Rutherford said “Gravity? Never heard of it mate.”

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About James Findon 161 Articles
James is the founder of LUCA.